Three different doctors ordered a total of 10 tests to pinpoint what's been up with me. The results are in from the tests and for the most part I just need to make a few changes and I'll be on my way to health and strength. The easy things? Make some diet changes and increase some deficient vitamins. That's the easy part, though I'm not too excited about minimizing chocolate, wheat, oats and sugar. I bought a juicer, 20 lbs. of fruit and some vitamins and supplements. The problem comes in when the doctor tells me to reduce my stress and increase my sleep. Not as easy as popping some vitamins. I've already set my life course on busy and I've recently realized I haven't left a whole lot of room for me. I have tried. I really have. The two biggest being the gym and house cleaners. I signed up for the gym because my early morning walks weren't working too well, due to Jon's traveling and Lizzie crawling out of her crib while I was out. But sadly, since signing up over a week ago for the gym, I haven't found a time to go just to get my picture taken for my card! I hired house cleaners to help with the big stuff I haven't been keeping up with since starting the preschool. But sadly, I haven't even been keeping up with the little stuff.
My personality that focuses on perfectionism may have gotten me far in life, but now it's getting me in trouble. I feel like my head is arguing all day long. "It's important! It's not important!" I fear that my days of getting lots done are gone. Sometimes projects for church or school, reading a great book, catching up on laundry have to be paid with the price of missed sleep. I might be tired the next day, but I feel satisfied. Now, I know that missed sleep costs me more than just a groggy day. I'm wiped out for a week with a dip in my health. The price is all of a sudden too steep if I am to be a good mom who can deal with the whining, crying, emotions of a bad day at school, homework, life's questions. I'm determined to alter my perspective. I have to. I'm not giving myself a choice. But, I am allowing myself a time of mourning for my old self (the one who thrived on accomplishing tasks, the one who stayed up late because that was my time) before I take the time to get to know the new me (the one with a bedtime, the one who doesn't eat chocolate chip cookies for breakfast and the one who allows minimal distress in her life even when her 2 year old rips off a diaper in her room at 8:00 at night that requires the room to be quarantined for sanitation purposes. I'll let you know when I get to know the new me, but so far I don't think I know her very well.
4 comments:
It's no fun to be told you can no longer live the way you want to. I'm facing that myself, if I don't want to be pleasantly plump the rest of my life. I will send you some stuff that I'm using right now to counteract it. Just to give you some ideas.
That's rough Sara. Who knew that trying to do everything would make you sick? I guess we really can't do everything without consequences, huh? Good luck with it! Let us know how it goes and what you do!
You have to minimize oats... just after you made all those cute little bags of them :)
I love the old you, new you and the in between you.
WE WILL TALK THIS WEEK!!
Sara, I can help. Send me all your chocolate chip cookies. It will be a sacrifice, but I can do it.
-Your selfless brother
Post a Comment